When A Lose Is A Win

I am a Michael Nesmith fan, both of his Monkees work and his copious solo career after the Monkees. In one of his solo songs, Tomorrow & Me, he has a line “I feel the time has come to accept apparent loss as a battle won.” Now, when I was in high school and first heard that line, I will admit my first thought was:

What sort of hippie claptrap is that?

I mean, if you lose, you obviously haven’t won, have you? Pretty black and white. A lot was black and white when I was 15. 🙂

But as I’ve aged, I see what Mike means. You can fail to achieve your goal, yet still walk away with information or connections or meaning that make it an overall win for you. Many scientists and technology people will tell you that they learn more from failures than experiments that go smoothly. And sometimes the very thing that keeps you from finding the specific success you wanted turns out to be a happy accident that will serve you better than what you thought you wanted in the first place.

For example, penicillin was one of those “failures.” The experiment went wrong, if you view it from the standpoint of what Alexander Fleming was trying to achieve, but instead they came up with a drug that has saved millions of lives.

The same holds true in writing craft and business. I am currently struggling with character. Every time I fail, I throw a quiet temper tantrum when no one is looking, but then I look at what went wrong. And then I walk away with more information on what doesn’t work, and am therefore one step closer to figuring out what does.

In business, you may make it all the way to the stage with an agent where they read your full…and then they don’t want to rep it. That’s disappointing, of course, because you’ve gotten excited to get so far, but it’s not really a “lose.” Most of the times when you get that far, an agent will give some indication of where the manuscript failed for him or her, and that feedback is valuable. Also, sometimes even if you don’t end up working together, you had a rapport and may have found a new friend or at least networking contact. And that can’t ever be a bad thing.

So I find that “losing” is often more a state of mind than a quantifiable measure. What you take away from the “battle” is what makes it a win or loss. Often, just the striving for the goal makes it a win, even if you fall short—because if you pay attention you always learn something that will make your next try better and stronger.

And sometimes, it’s like The Rolling Stones say: “You can’t always get what you want. But if you try, sometimes you just might find you get what you need.”

What about you? Have you ever “lost”—only to find that you actually “won”?

GoosesQuill FB

Thankful for Friendship

In freshman year of high school, a new friend of mine invited me to sit with her friends during lunch. At the table was a tall girl, who had dumped her little box of raisins onto the table, and was taking each raisin one by one, pretended they were running across the table, then dropping them off the edge saying “AHHHH!” until they hit the floor.

This was how I met Donna Longcoy.

For almost 30 years, we have been friends. We made it through high school together, and college. We went on vacations together that featured pushing an antique car up a hill and knocking on random doors in a strange town in search of a funnel to siphon gas from said car to the out-of-gas truck towing it. We’ve been friends through fun times, hard times, guy trouble, job difficulties (we worked together for a while), weddings and funerals. Even though Donna and her husband live most of the way across the country, I am the official godmother to their 3 greyhounds, should anything happen to them.

Through most of this long journey, Donna and I shared the Monkees. With our other friend Donna Hanson, we followed “the guys” anywhere they appeared from New York to Virginia. Every tour brought new adventures, new memories, and new friends. The Monkees have been in our lives since 1986.

I dabble with drawing, and I had drawn a picture of the 4 Monkees. Over the years, one by one, I gathered the signatures of Davy Jones, Peter Tork, and Micky Dolenz on that picture. At last, the only signature I needed was Mike Nesmith.

This was a problem.

Michael Nesmith never toured with the Monkees after the group broke up in the late 1960s. He did a few select dates, but was for the most part missing. And he didn’t care much for solo tours, either, so he was hard to find. Until the past 2 years, Mike hadn’t toured since 1992. And even on these solo tours this year and last, he would not sign autographs for waiting fans—only to those lucky enough to get backstage passes.

Last year, neither Donna nor I got a pass. This year, a miracle occurred, and Donna, in the 11th hour, scored a backstage pass to Mike’s solo show in Arizona! Now, Mike had very strict rules about what he would sign. He’d sign almost unlimited items from his solo career, but only ONE Monkees item. ONE.

And Donna called me and said, “Send me your picture. I’ll get him to sign it.”

How incredible is that? She gave up her one Monkees item for me. She didn’t have to. I wouldn’t have asked her to. But she knew how long I had been trying for this, and she offered.

That is one great friend. But then, I don’t need proof of how awesome a friend Donna is—there’s a reason we’ve been friends for 29 years, after all!

So in this season of Thanksgiving, I am more thankful for my friend Donna than I can say. It is my fervent hope that our friendship will continue until our deaths—and on into Heaven, where we can rock out to the Monkees with our other friends whenever we want.

How about you? Any special friends you are thankful for and want to give a shout out to?

GoosesQuill FB

The Monkees Came To My Town…

On July 20, the surviving Monkees—Micky Dolenz, Peter Tork, and Michael Nesmith—came to Philadelphia with their second year of touring. My friends who lived through the 1980s and 90s MonkeeMania know I am a die-hard fan. I have been to Monkees events in the snow, the scorching heat, the pouring rain, and even a sandstorm. I have learned that when going to see the Monkees, I should expect the unexpected. This show was no exception.

Mann - Logo

The Monkees at the Mann Music Center
Philadelphia, PA, 7/20/2013

The adventure began before we even got to the Mann Music Center. We were about a mile away (according to our Google directions) when traffic on the Expressway stopped dead. Not moving off the exit. The clock ticked ever closer to 8 PM (show time). The veins popping out of my temples must have finally scared my husband, because he left the non-moving line and went to the next exit to try to enter Fairmount Park from the far end and wend our way in. Except that we couldn’t—roads in the Park were closed everywhere!

We had no idea how close to the Mann we were, but people were parking all along the road, so we did, too. We loaded up and prepared to walk. A woman stopped her car and asked me, “Is this within walking distance to the Mann?” I replied, “I hope so.” I couldn’t figure out how she knew I was going to the Mann until I remembered I was wearing my Monkees tour shirt from last year!

So we walked. And walked. And walked. Did I mention that it was hot as Hades? The heat index was well into the 90s, even though it was eight o’clock at night. After we slogged the MILE AND A HALF to the Mann, I was dripping like a melting candle.

During the torture trek, we discovered the source of the closed roads and the stand-still traffic. The event planners of Philadelphia had decided to hold a run of some sort in the Park on the same afternoon as the concert. And the parking for the run was…the Mann parking lot.

By the time we oozed through the gates of the Mann, we had missed half of the first song—“Last Train to Clarksville.” Not bad, when you consider that I saw people arriving at the show as late as 30 minutes into it.

When we sat down, I gaped. Our seats were amazing! They hadn’t looked so close on the seating chart. We were in the 5th row! Only a Box containing 4 rows was between us and the stage. Unfortunately, the box also contained 2 girls who insisted on getting up and dancing. I had to laugh, though, because I could not have planned their blocking of my view any better if I had tried. Whenever they stood up, they were perfectly aligned with Micky at center stage and Peter at stage left. Perfectly covered those two. Every. Single. Time. So I saw a lot of Mike on the far side of the stage. Which is not a bad thing! I don’t know if someone said something to them or if they just got heat exhaustion, but they did stop blocking everyone’s view about halfway through the show.

Mann - The Coolest Fan

The Monkees and their coolest fan

In spite of the late arrival and the heat and the girls, I thoroughly enjoyed the show. The guys sounded fantastic, and they had a good time up on stage. They cracked jokes about the heat, and even played around with a cooling fan set up on one side of the stage. Their set list was almost identical to last years’, but that was fine by me because I think it features some of their best music. The only thing that would make this show perfect is if Davy were alive and part of the mix.

Highlights of the show? For me, every song could have been a highlight, either for the musicianship, the lyrics, the performance, or the memories it called to mind.

Specifically, Mike’s simple yet powerful “You Told Me” is a personal favorite, “What Am I Doin’ Hangin’ ‘Round?” brought flashbacks of the TV show, and the whirling, skirling “Circle Sky” rocked the house.

Michael Nesmith

Michael Nesmith

Micky’s ever-energetic “I’m A Believer” was a fan fave, his veiled protest song “Randy Scouse Git” got me singing (as always), and “As We Go Along” let Micky’s bluesy-jazzy voice soar over an enchanted crowd.

Micky Dolenz

Micky Dolenz

Peter’s rendition of “Early Morning Blues and Greens” was better than Davy’s original on Headquarters,  the 60s anthem “In This Generation” (written by Peter and used as the closing theme to the show in the second season) lifted the crowd out of their seats, and the kaleidoscopic, hallucinogenic “Do I Have To Do This All Over Again?” left me breathless and dizzy.

Peter Tork

Peter Tork

And what of Davy Jones? This year’s show was minus two of the video tributes to their fallen band member, but “Daddy’s Song” remained. Really, you cannot have a set focusing on the weirdness that is Head without showing the splendid positive-negative editing of that song (as well as Davy’s fantastic dancing). And, of course, no Monkees show is complete without the iconic “Daydream Believer,” carried this year, as last year, by people pulled onstage from the audience and the audience as a whole.

Mann - Daydream Believer

Daydream Believer

During the show, I struggled with my camera early on. Got a lot of swirly, out of focus, off-color shots. I could not believe that I was in fifth row and couldn’t get a decent picture! But I finally stumbled upon a setting (in the Sports menu) I hadn’t tried before, which took care of the focus/swirly issue. And then I noticed that Mike was wearing white pants! Hallelujah! I quickly used the manual white balance on my camera to set “white” to the color of his pants, and that took care of the off-color issue. I ended up getting some great shots!

Mike & Peter Jamming

Mike & Peter Jamming


The performance, with video clips running continually in the background, captured the verve and fun that has made the Monkees a crowd-pleasing favorite for so many years. The songs are “oldies,” but the guys play them fresh every time, the joy they have in the process of creating and playing the music making the songs ever new.

Micky Shaking Hands

Micky Shaking Hands

After jamming with the Monkees for several hours, I was happy-exhausted. I often wait around after shows trying to get autographs, but I know from experience that the Mann backstage is pretty much inaccessible. I might have hung out anyway, but when the show ended, a light rain was falling…and our umbrella was in the car 1.5 miles away. The storms had been forecast to be through the area by 8:15, so we hadn’t bothered with the umbrella.

Thankfully, the rain stopped almost as soon as we set out for the car, but a raging lightning storm lit up a fourth of the night sky. Awesomely beautiful streaks of lightning jagged through the sky, some jumping from cloud to cloud, some spearing down to earth. Very scary, as we hurried along paths lined with trees that looked suspiciously like lightning rods. I had thought we’d be able to take our time walking back to the car, but the storm made us hurry as fast as getting to the show, and we were once again sweat-drenched as we threw ourselves into our car.

Severe weather conditions, traffic troubles, technical difficulties both human and machine, rocking music, spot-on vocals, exuberant performances, and an addictive, potent mix of new and old memories—everything I expected from a Monkees concert and at the same time, so much more.

Mann - Three Shot

Mike, Micky & Peter at the Mann

Monkee-ing Around

If you know me at all, you know I’m a huge Monkees fan. I was devastated when Davy Jones died earlier this year, because I was sure I’d never see another Monkees concert again. However, in a surprise move, Micky Dolenz, Peter Tork, and Michael Nesmith got together and did a short tour this November!

Disclaimer: All the photos in this post are my own and are owned by me.
If you use them for any purpose, please identify them and attribute them to me.
Do not change them in any way or use them commercially.

All Three

Mike Nesmith, Micky Dolenz, Peter Tork
Keswick Theatre
Glenside, PA
11/29/2012

Not only were they touring, but they were playing my “hometown” theater, the Keswick…on Nov 29th. Why does the date matter? Because my two best friends and I rocked the Monkees all through high school and college and beyond. And Donna Hanson Woolman’s birthday was Nov 29th. She died almost 10 years ago, and I couldn’t help but feel some sort of karmic convergence in the date.

Keswick Marquee

And to further the cosmic aspect of the Keswick’s date, my other Monkee friend, Donna L., scored 6th row center seats for me. The amazing thing is not that she got the seats, but that she got them 4 HOURS after the tickets had gone on sale. As a veteran of many concerts, I can tell you those prime seats should have been gone in the first 4 MINUTES. While I don’t believe that God cares a hoot where I sat to see the Monkees, I couldn’t help feeling that Donna Hanson Woolman had a heavenly hand in making that happen.

So, I saw them at the Keswick Theater in Glenside, PA, and at the NJ State Theater in New Brunswick, NJ. Both shows rocked! All the favorites, plus all of my favorites that they never used to play. Since Mike never toured with the other three in the USA before, this was the first time I ever heard a lot of his songs live. Since his are some of my favorite tunes, I greatly enjoyed rocking to them.

Micky MaracasThe guys sounded great, and the music was excellent. These guys can still rock it like no one’s business! Mike on the guitar, Peter on guitar, keyboard, and banjo, and Micky on guitar, drums, tambourine, maracas, bongos, and the big timpani drum for Randy Scouse Git. The crowds jammed hard, too, singing along with every song.

The guys had an easy rapport with each other, talking back and forth in a mix of ad lib and scripted banter. They didn’t mind goofing aroundMoog Mike a little either, with Peter hamming it up during Auntie Grizelda, and Mike pretending to be a Moog synthesizer during Daily Nightly.

Peter CUIn an interview I read, Peter stated very firmly that this was not meant to be a “Davy is Dead” tour, but that Davy would be very much represented. Sure enough, on the big screen behind the band, video clips from the TV show, their movie HEAD, and even from 33 1/2 Revolutions Per Monkee ran continuously, Davy included. They also had a special tribute video montage of Davy, featuring clips from his pre-Monkees day as well as Monkee highlights. And, of course, no Monkees concert could be complete without Daydream Believer. For this, Micky pulled an audience member up on stage to help him sing, and the audience as a whole carried the refrain, while Davy danced on the big screen. It was a moving and fitting tribute.

DavyDaydream Believer

Davy
Daydream Believer

I had a great time, hitting back-to-back Monkees concerts and singing myself hoarse! I felt like a teenager again – until Toddler woke me up very early in the morning. Then I remembered I wasn’t 18 anymore!

I’ve been a Monkees fan since grade school, and starting following their tours in 1986, their 20th Reunion Tour. I’ve seen them together and on solo tours many times over the past 26 years. No matter how many times I see them, or in what configuration, I always love their shows. Together or separate, they have never failed to bring the energy, the skillful musicianship, and the showmanship I’ve come to expect.

Even after all these years, I’m A Believer.

Micky CU

Peter KeyboardMike

WP-Backgrounds Lite by InoPlugs Web Design and Juwelier Schönmann 1010 Wien