Peace On Earth

20151213_195930Christmas is my favorite season. It has nothing to do with gifts (either giving or getting) and everything to do with the peace and goodwill I feel at this time of year. One of my favorite things to do is bask in the light of the Christmas tree and listen to music or read a book and just be.

Maybe it’s just nostalgia that makes this season seem a time of more peace and joy and goodwill than other times of year. I don’t know—and I truly don’t care to delve too deeply. Sometimes a mystery is best left unsolved.

The world today is in great need of peace and goodwill. During this past year, I have shed too many tears for murdered strangers and the future we are leaving my daughter. I have lived too much with fear—fear for my country’s future and my daughter’s safety. I have screamed too loudly at the endless stupidity, greed, and hate that are shoving humanity to the brink of collapse.

I need this Christmas. I need to remember that there are many good people in this world. That there is a future worth fighting for. That the fight is not futile. That this mess of a world is not the world I am destined to leave my daughter.

I need this Christmas spirit to remind me that every act of kindness pushes back the darkness. That it is never too late to be the candle in the window. That one person can make a difference.

I am that one person.

You are that one person.

We can change the world.

We must change the world.

Peace on Earth…

Let’s do this.

But first I need this Christmas to fortify my soul.

 

Thanksgiving 2015

Thanksgiving is a time when I think about all the things I am grateful for in my life. I realize I am very lucky because I have a whole lot to be thankful for.

NEW RELEASE!Most recently, my debut novel, THE WITCH OF ZAL, came out this month! I have finally achieved the dream of being a real author with a real book. Many people don’t ever get to achieve their dreams, and I am so grateful to all the people who shared this long journey with me and supported me in so many ways.

I am also thankful for my family. My parents are still alive and healthy and very involved in their grandchildren’s lives. I have a friend who lost both her parents this year (only 12 days apart), and that has made me appreciate having them even more. I’m even thankful for my “little” brother—we are very different, but I know he’ll have my back if I ever need him. A far cry from the bratty kid I fought with all the time!

Of course my husband and daughter are high on my “thankful for” list. My wonderful husband supports me in so many ways, and we’re really two peas in a pod. And my daughter, my “Kinder-girl” as she is known on Facebook, keeps me hopping and makes me laugh and amazes me each day as she grows into her own person.

Friends are also precious, and I have too many to name here that have been there for me in times of need. Whether just listening to me vent, or going out of their way to help me out, my friends have helped me through a lot.

I have so much else to be thankful for. I have a warm house and enough food and clothes. We have enough money to be secure and we live in a relatively safe environment. Looking at the frightening things happening today, the masses of people who have nothing, who have left everything they knew, makes me hold very dear the things I do have—things so easy to take for granted.

So take a moment today to reflect on what you have to be thankful for. Life can get hectic and we forget what we have in the rush to try and get further ahead, further up the ladder, further than the people next door. For just one day, stop the rat race and cherish what you have—what you have accomplished. Life is short, so take a moment to enjoy it.

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

THE WITCH OF ZAL Cover Reveal and Surprise!

Hey, everyone! I am so excited to share the wonderful cover for THE WITCH OF ZAL! My publisher, Evil Jester Press, did a fantastic job.

And…SURPRISE! My book is available for purchase RIGHT NOW in paperback and Kindle.

WitchOfZal Cover

I hope you love the cover as much as I do–and I hope you have as much fun reading the book as I did writing it!

1203thewitchofzal_coverspreadOL

I’ll keep you posted as my journey continues. Thank you all for coming along for the ride!

October Madness

I should be writing…

…but I am filling out invitations to my daughter’s birthday party.

I should be editing…

…but I am online searching for my daughter’s costume.

I should be marketing…

…but I am helping my daughter with a school birthday project.

I should be doing my galley edits…

…but this week my daughter’s school has 3 half days.

I should be sleeping…

…but I am doing all the things I didn’t get done when I should have.

I am sure everyone has a particularly crazy time of year. For some it is Thanksgiving or Christmas because they host family gatherings or travel. For some it is a time of year when work is heavy, such as CPAs at tax time.

I suffer from October madness at the end of October/beginning of November.

No matter how hard I try, I can’t seem to get far enough ahead of the rush to not have it be a rush. I thought I was sitting pretty this year—until my galley edits showed up. Always something unexpected! And then I have to readjust my plate-spinning.

Between parties for my daughter’s birthday and Halloween parties and her friends’ birthdays, it seems non-stop. And this year I’m also helping out at the school Halloween party in her classroom. For an introvert like me, this is a very draining time of year.

Still, it is finite, and I can look ahead to November 4th and say, “That’s when the craziness ends.” It’s coming, I just have to forge ahead until I reach it. I make lots of lists and hold myself to strict discipline as I strike things off. No time for naps or Word Scramble now!

What’s your “insane” time of year? Any tricks to get through it?

Adventures in the Land of Zal

01 - Emerald City SignThis week’s post is going to be short and sweet, because I am neck-deep in reviewing the galleys of my book THE WITCH OF ZAL.

What’s a galley, you ask?

Before a book goes to print but after it has been formatted, they create a galley of it—an uncorrected proof of the text. The author then goes over the galley to catch any last-minute typos or issues that might have been missed earlier. Since there is a substantial lag time between turning in the final edits and reading the galley, the author can see it with fresh eyes.

I found that the galley, which uses a different font and formatting than my final submitted manuscript did, makes mistakes easier to find. Thankfully, I am not finding many! I have to read both the print galley and the ebook galley. I’ve read the print, and hope to finish the ebook today.

The other exciting news is that the cover is finally finished! I saw a sneak peek earlier this week, and am eager to share it with the world. Having a cover makes the book very real.

And I’m glad it is real, because I have booked my first conference, at the New Jersey Association of School Librarians (NJASL) conference November 15th. Discussing books with hundreds of librarians is going to be a thrill, and I can’t wait to meet them. After all, I’ve known since I was young that libraries are magic and librarians are magicians.

THE WITCH OF ZAL is almost at the finish line, and the next phase of my writing life will begin!

The New Regimen: Checking In

When my daughter started full-time Kindergarten in September, I celebrated. I was full of plans for how to break out my days and how to balance home-work responsibilities.

So now we’re halfway through October. How’s the new regimen been working for me? Time to check in.

First, I was going to get a lot of writing done. So much writing. I have not gotten as much of that done as I had hoped. I do get my blog post done more quickly, and I have been able to get to other writing in spurts, but not in the focused manner I had envisioned. Part of the problem is that I have taken naps in the afternoon far more than I would like. I’m just not sleeping well at night lately, and if I don’t grab an hour in the afternoon, I am wrecked by the evening.

Second, I was going to get some of these non-writing projects under control and off my To-Do list. I have actually accomplished several of these projects, although, again, not as many as I had hoped. Still, it’s nice to see that To-Do list get smaller!

Third, I wanted to incorporate my exercise routine while my daughter was at school. This I have done fairly well. I generally complete all my walking before I get her from school. In fact, the walk to pick her up usually finishes my step goal for the day. I break up the walking into a few short walks during the day, which gets me out of my chair and gets the blood moving again. So it helps me with the work side of things, too.

Finally, I wanted to try and end the constant push-pull of having to “choose” between working and spending time with my daughter. Whenever I would work while she was home, I would feel guilty. Whenever I would play with her instead of work, I would feel the weight of everything I could be getting done. It was a no-win situation for me—part of my mind was always somewhere else.

In this, at least, I have been pretty successful so far. Because I am able to get the things I must get done finished before I pick my daughter up from school, I can relax into spending the afternoon/evening hours with her until she goes to bed. We can chat or play or go to her extra-curricular events without me feeling pressured by things yet to do. I spent 4 hours at a local farm this weekend going hayriding, pumpkin picking, having lunch, and watching her play, and not once did I stress over things left undone. We had a fun, beautiful day out together.

My relationship with my daughter was the most important part of this new regimen for me, so I feel as if I have made a very successful start. However, I need to address the other parts of the new regimen that are not working so well.

My main problem is focus. The concrete things I know I need to do, I always get done. But then I drift on all the nebulous things I need to do but don’t have to do just yet—with the result that none of them get done. I need to break those things into discreet, concrete pieces and assign them a day. If I can do that, I believe I will find my productivity rising to the level I want. Without a focused, concrete list, my laziness expands to fit my free time.

So overall, my new writing plan is succeeding in the most important parts, but needs some work and adjustment. As is the way of the world, I expect I will finally have my new regimen tweaked and humming along just in time for Christmas break, when it will all fall apart again!

How do you make sure you stick to schedules?

Literary Senioritis

When I was in high school, people would talk about experiencing “senioritis” in the last year of school—that feeling that high school is dragging on too long and you are eager for the next stage of your life to begin.

I didn’t really understand what they were talking about until the middle of my junior year—my senioritis struck early. Suddenly, I felt “done” with high school. Not that there weren’t more facts and skills to be learned in school, but emotionally I had finished—I wanted to move on. With me restless and daydreaming, the next year and a half seemed very long.

Oddly, this is not the only time in my life that I have felt senioritis. In college and in every job I have had, there has come a moment where I am “done.” Not that I didn’t still enjoy my work, but a feeling that I had learned all I could in that place and it was time to move on. As if my personal growth required a change to keep me from stagnating. I never ignored that feeling.

I am experiencing senioritis again now. As my debut novel nears release, the familiar “ants-in-the-pants” sensation keeps me pacing the floor. All the knowledge about the business and the marketing I have accrued over the years is building inside of me, waiting for the dam to breach and let the flood go. I know I have more to learn, but it cannot be learned at this stage—I need to graduate to the next stage to continue to grow.

And so I sit here with anticipation tingling my skin, waiting for the launch sequence to commence in earnest. I alternately daydream of the perfect launch party and have nightmares about book signing disasters. I am as ready as I can be for the next chapter of my career, but still riddled with the anxiety of the unknown.

Literary senioritis: an uncomfortable sensation of feeling confined by my current writer cocoon yet feeling anxious about emerging as an author and learning to fly.

Do you ever feel that push-pull of wanting to stay where you are yet also yearning to be more than you are now?

Book Fair!

Library at the De La Salle College of Saint Be...

Library at the De La Salle College of Saint Benilde. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

You already know that I believe libraries are magical places. The sense of awe and wonder I felt as a child has never left me, and entering any library—even one I’ve never been in before—feels like coming home.

Book fairs give me that same giddy feeling.

My daughter had her first book fair this week. Until I walked in and saw the stacks of books, I had forgotten all about book fairs. But the moment I entered the library at her school, it all came rushing back. The books—sleek, shiny, new. The covers calling out, “Pick me! Pick me!” The overwhelming desire to plop down on the floor and read forever.

Ahhhh…

I picked the books for my daughter this year—largely because she, like me, would want EVERY BOOK THERE. Next year I will let her pick her own. By then I hope to have taught her how to read the book jacket and the first page to see if she would really want it. This year, I told her to write down the books she was interested in, and we would get them out of the library to read.

Aside from the sheer magic of the book fair, all the money raised goes to support the school library. It is a major part of their budget, so when you buy a little magic, you enable the library to buy some more magic for their permanent shelves. Buy books to buy more books! It’s like a magic spell all of its own.

Libraries are magic.

Book fairs are magic.

Words are magic.

Go make some magic.

 

Introverts, Extroverts, and Social Pain

My daughter and I share an artistic bent, but we are also very different. The main difference is that she is a shining extrovert and I am a textbook introvert. At age five, she will walk up to any kid on the playground and ask to play with them, while I practice invisibility spells when people try to talk to me. (So far I have not found one that works.)

Most of the time, my daughter’s outgoing nature wins the day and she happily joins in the other kids’ games. The other day, though, she was deliberately excluded from joining with other girls. She came to me and told me they wouldn’t play with her.

I had no idea what to tell her.

You see, as a child I was often on the outside looking in–but it never bothered me. Some of you might think I am remembering with rose-colored glasses, glossing over the hurt of being excluded. But I honestly don’t think I am. I cannot ever remember crying over not being included in social stuff. I cried when my one-time best friend slapped me across the face in a culmination of bullying in grade school. The semester I was bullied in high school, I dreaded going to school and seethed with anger. But I never once remember crying over exclusion.

I rarely sought kids out to play with, so I guess I didn’t have many chances to get rejected. And I preferred my own company, so when I was excluded, it was often more of a relief than anything else. Exclusion and rejection didn’t draw tears from me—at most, I was puzzled by the urge to be mean to someone for no apparent reason. (I am no saint—I understood quite well the urge to be mean to someone in retaliation.) And I would shrug and go back to my books.

But when my daughter came to me and said they wouldn’t play with her, I saw something besides puzzlement in her face. I saw pain. She was hurt. It broke my heart. Telling her to ignore it, to go play by herself, to play with a different toy, etc., just didn’t cut it for her. It wasn’t the toys she wanted—it was the company.

She’s an extrovert, and she experienced a social pain I have never felt.

So I got to wondering if social pain is more acute among extroverts than introverts. In the case of my daughter and myself, the answer seems to be yes. This makes me worry for the future. My daughter will walk a minefield I never did—the minefield of caring too much what others think. Of trying to fit in and be accepted. At what cost? And most of all, I see my sensitive little girl open to a world of hurt from the mean kids in a way I never experienced.

What do I say to her? How do I comfort her? How do I make her see that what mean kids think doesn’t matter, and that the kids who would purposely exclude her are not the kids she should want to be with anyway? I’m already at a loss and she is only five. What happens in those angst-ridden teenage year? In college?

I don’t know how it will all play out. Only time will tell. Do you think extroverts and introverts feel the social pain of exclusion differently? Do you have any advice for this introverted mom and her extroverted child?

My Writing Season Has Begun

DSCN3173My daughter went back to school last week—full day for the first time ever. I did exactly what I had planned to do her first two days back—whatever I wanted! I napped, I read, I just relaxed.

Now, however, it’s time to get some work done.

I’d like to set some sort of schedule for the school day, a schedule that incorporates exercise, work, and what I call personal projects. Personal projects are things like photo albums or listening to music or doing genealogy—things that are necessary, that build up over time, and slowly become overwhelming if not attended to.

I have often lamented the inherent imbalance in my life since my child was born. I would either spend all my free time writing, thus getting behind on my personal projects, or divert to some of the personal projects, which then allowed my writing to languish. So I am hoping, with 6+ hours of child-free time 5 days a week, I can now find some sort of schedule where I can move both sets of projects forward at the same time, and thereby not feel the pressure of having so much undone work staring at me.

So one of my goals this week is to sketch out a weekly schedule and see how that works. I know things will come up that derail it from time to time, but I am a person of routine. I like my routines. I think that’s one reason this past summer was so wearing on my nerves—I had no routine for my work.

I purposely left my schedule as loose as possible because I wanted my daughter to have a “free” summer. We had karate and swimming, but the rest of the time was unstructured play or trips to various play places or to the park or play dates. It was great for her, not so great for me!

Now school is here and we are all routinized again. I look forward to my writing season and can’t wait to see where it takes me!

Do you have a writing season, or is your routine the same all year round?

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